Heart for Missions

My sweet friend, Barnabas.

“The harvest is plenty, but the workers are few.”

Matthew 9:27

I have to admit, I am a Mexico girl. From the first time I stepped foot onto the Back2Back campus in Monterrey, Mexico, June 2007, I felt completely at home. Through the last several years, my journeys have taken me from spending a week each year in Mexico to spending two weeks, to the point where I am now, spending at least 10 weeks a year in Mexico.

I’m also bold enough to say that I am completely spoiled and blessed. I have my wonderful friends and family in the U.S. and a wonderful family in Mexico I have taken as my own. Although I have no biological grandchildren yet, there are three (soon to be four!) precious cherubs in Mazatlán, Mexico that I call mine. I have the sweetest friendships imaginable with Back2Back staff members. My sweet husband works so hard to afford us the opportunity to invest in Back2Back, giving me the chance to be flexible with my schedule and travel to Mexico as needed. Let’s suffice it to say I am completely invested in Mexico.

But, I just took a jump off the high dive and have had the experience of a lifetime in Jos, Nigeria. I wish just by writing, those who read could truly understand the pictures of the last eight days. Although I don’t believe words could ever do this experience justice, my heart is so heavy to express the incredible need of the orphans and widows in Jos that I feel I must try.

Eighteen team members were welcomed to Nigeria by Back2Back staff members, Daniel Asama and Tracy Smart. After traveling for close to 24 hours, we stepped out of the Abuja airport to sights, smells, and sounds unfamiliar. I knew immediately I was completely out of my comfort zone and was watching in anticipation of what God was going to do through me and in me throughout the next eight days.

Those eight days were hard; I’m not going to lie! Right before I left the U.S., I had the closest thing to an all out panic attack I’ve ever had. I doubt anyone loves sleep as much as I do, and I lost a lot of it on the travel to get to Nigeria. We had a five hour time difference to deal with as we tried to adjust our internal clocks. We rode four hours from the airport from Jos to Abuja and back in vans. We were hot, sweaty, and dusty. The food was unfamiliar. We slept in a converted hostile without air conditioning and most of us awoke each morning at 4 am to the sound of the Muslim call to prayer a mile or so outside of our gated compound. We even had a couple of days of being awakened in the night to the sounds of team members having major stomach issues. Many of us would have paid at least $20 for a cup of ice water. (I think I was up to $100!) We were mostly disconnected from our loved ones at home with extremely limited internet and unreliable electricity.

Before you stop reading, now hear the awesome! God does amazing things when He puts His people in places completely at His mercy. Moses argued that he was not an eloquent speaker. “Pick Aaron!” he said. But the Lord chose Moses. Gideon watched his army dwindle to 300 Israelites to defeat an entire Mideonite army. The ratio was absolutely ridiculous: like one Israelite to every 450 Mideonites. Both Joseph and Daniel risked their lives interpreting God’s truth in the dreams of polytheistic kings. God used the faith and boldness of a Jewish orphan named Esther to save His people from being horrifically slaughtered. I could go on forever with stories that illustrate what happens when God puts one of His own into a completely impossible situation.

Because I could write for days about all the awesome things that happened on this trip, I have picked two days I am going to highlight. My prayer is that God uses my words and stories to communicate to each one of you both the blessings and the incredible need waiting in Nigeria.

My daughter, Kassie, interned for seven weeks in Nigeria the summer of 2011. One of the fruits of that time is the sponsorship of a beautiful Nigerian girl named Esther. As a family, we have loved and prayed for her over the last three years. One of the most exciting parts of this trip was that I was going to finally get to meet precious Esther.

In December, Esther’s 13 year old sister, Felicia was tragically killed after being hit by a car. When I arrived in Nigeria, I asked many questions regarding the adjustment of Esther’s mom and sisters to the loss of Felicia. As you can imagine, the family is having a hard time dealing with this loss. But to add insult to injury, there is much speculation rooted in cultural superstition surrounding her death. Within the village, family members, including Esther, have been accused of practicing witchcraft and told they were to blame for this horrible accident.

In my small group on the day I was going to meet Esther, I shared that one of my prayers for the day was the opportunity to speak God’s truth into Esther and remind her of the precious princess she is. Can you even imagine being 11 and told you were the reason your sister died? Thankfully, for once in my life, I had the sense to ask some more questions before I started asking her questions about all these accusations. I found out that it was unclear how much she knew of the accusations against her and was lovingly advised to guard what I said.

I have to admit that I was somewhat confused. I really felt I heard God’s call to proclaim truth over this family. But, if her knowledge was indeed limited as to specific accusations against her, I sure didn’t want to be the one to directly or indirectly tell her!

Later in the afternoon, we walked around the village praying as a group for various situations there. Daniel mentioned wanting to walk to one of the widow’s houses to pray for her, and I thought her name sounded familiar. As we stepped closer to the house, I realized he wanted us to pray with Esther’s mom.

You know that feeling of absolute panic because you realize the plan you had, which would have been comfortable, has just spun right into the complete discomfort zone? I quickly started rationalizing in my head.

“Ok, Lord, I thought You wanted me to proclaim truth over this family. But to Esther….and in private. Right now I’m surrounded by a bunch of team members, most who I don’t know very well yet! My words get all mixed up in my head when I haven’t planned them out. Remember how You made me? I can generate conversation with children easily! But I don’t enjoy being emotional and vulnerable in front of adults. So, I think I’ll pass on this one!”

That second, my sweet friend Beth leaned over and whispered, “This is exactly the chance you prayed for this morning!”

I don’t know if the look on my face reflected it, but I was getting a little sick to my stomach. I knew I would become emotional talking to Esther’s mom about Esther and Felicia and I do NOT like to cry in front of people. This was not at all what I had prayed for!

I quickly replied to Beth, “I prayed for a chance to talk to Esther. This is her mom and she is an adult who doesn’t even speak much English!” I didn’t even bother to add the fact that I was surrounded by almost 25 people that I didn’t really know.

I know Beth said something else to me, but I don’t even remember what it was. By this point I was feeling pretty much like I imagine Moses felt when God asked him to speak to the Israelites.

“Seriously, Jesus? Can’t someone else do this?”

I moved closer to this beautiful woman and began to speak. I don’t remember what I said. I don’t know what the impact of my words was. Although Daniel was interpreting for me, I don’t even know if she understood exactly what I was trying to say. But I believe God used me to minister to her. I believe that because once I opened my mouth, His truth began to flow forth. I walked away knowing that I had obeyed. God asked me to do something and I did it, even though I did not want to. Those moments became as much about obedience as ministering to her. Once again, God showed me what He does in an “only He can do it” moment.

That occurred on our first day we were ministering and working. Now, fast forward to our last day. We visited two incredible ministries that Back2Back is not partnering with on a regular basis.

One of these places is a orphanage named Kids With A Vision. The woman who manages the home, Grace Adams, shared her story of how God provided her with a house to give many children an education and a home. But she also shared of her great need. Her two greatest difficulties are clean water and food for the kids. Yet she continually trusts God to provide.

The other place we went to that day is called Grace Gardens. It is a ministry focused on women and children living in the local brothels. The director, Missy, goes into the brothels, weekly ministering to the people there. Currently, the facility is full, yet Missy cannot say no to the needs of these women. It costs about $4000 a month to run this ministry and $1500 is covered in sponsorship from the States. The rest comes from their pockets or random donations. Like Grace at Kids With A Vision, Missy chooses to believe every day that God will continue to provide for their current and future needs.

I had the opportunity to have a quiet conversation with Leah Smart in transit from one place to another that day.

“What do we need to do to get involved with these ministries, Leah?” I asked. My heart was so burdened by the need of these ministries. Not only for financial support, but also for being a set of familiar faces, regularly pouring into the lives of these beautiful women and children.

“More staff,” she gently replied. “The four staff members we have in Nigeria, Tracy and I included, are stretched completely thin. We go 100 miles an hour six and even seven days a week. I don’t know how we could take on anything else.”

In that moment, I truly thought my heart would break. I think the weight of the urgency completely hit me. But in complete contrast to the helplessness I felt, came the utter resolve to become another voice for the needs in Nigeria.

We need people to become child sponsors! There are beautiful children there who not only need the financial support that comes with these sponsorships, but also the letters and the knowledge they have someone who is praying for them every day.

We need groups! I can promise if you are willing to go and lean into Jesus throughout your time there, listening for His voice, you will have one of the most incredible experiences of your life. Notice I didn’t say easy, but without a doubt, incredible. Can I add here that I have been unable to find anywhere in God’s word where He calls us to easy service?

As a group member, not only are you able to pour into the children, the local people, and the Back2Back staff, but realistically many staff members come from being a group member. I have personally watched people come on trips and leave called to minister as a futureBack2Back staff member both short and long term.

We need staff! There are so many more children who need our help and support! But, a very important value of Back2Back is to go deep and not wide. We cannot go wider until we have the resources necessary to continue going deep with the homes and villages we work with currently.

What are the reasons holding you back? Are you afraid? Oh gosh, I was, too. Do you have a connection with a child in Mexico? I do, too. Do you feel like it is too hard to divide your interest? I did, too. Are you already struggling financially and don’t know how you could add another financial commitment? We are, too.

Is it enough to know that God has called us to serve these precious people? Is it enough to know that they NEED us? Step out in faith and let our precious Jesus handle the details.